Amazing Race: Unfinished Business ep07: You Don’t Get Paid Unless You Win

After a week off, Amazing Race is back! Gary and Mallory are shown with their special Snapple product placement meal- they are aiming to be the first parent/child team to win. Jet and Cord are cowboying up close behind. Teams are flying to a city in India called Varanasi that half the contestants someone pronounce like colonoscopy.

Kent and Vyxsin smartly ask the cabbie to take them to the travel agent, all others go right to airport. It ends up making no difference as they are on the same flight as most of the others. Except cowboys who get sorta duped into a later flight. Crazy Ron stops for food again! We’re renaming him Hungry Ron.

Big Easy has a band-aid on his head for unexplained reasons, although with his height it probably happens a lot. Gallory do some research on the city before their flight- Mallory hilariously calls the Ganges “ganja”- that kinda explains a lot about you Mallory. Oh my gravy- the cowboys are an hour back, only ones on their flight.

Teams arrive in Varanasi. Kent whacks his head on the trunk, looks like Big Easy isn’t the only one with a head injury.. between those two and honorary member Crazy Ron, this looks like it’s the head injury leg of the race. Globetrotters have a crazy fast cabbie who is passing everyone. Goths arrive first at the Tonga stand for the clue to the Roadblock. Teams have to find elaborately dressed holy men from a bunch of photographs to get clues to a phrase.

Big Easy has a huge advantage with his height, seeing over people. Jen gets some help from Big Easy and then ditches him and ends up first to solve it. As long as Kisha doesn’t stop to pee (again), they’ll keep their lead.. Hungry Ron is probably slowed down by his meal, taking his sweet old time. Zev is having trouble with the noise and crowds of the city, earplugs are helping him. Cord arrives last and hustles the hell out of it, running to find the holy men, passing Hungry Ron who is totally lost and waaaaaay behind.

Teams head to Tulsi Ghat for the detour where they have to either feed the fire or feed the buffalo. Feed the fire involves handling buffalo manure so maybe not the best idea but Pisha and Jen are trying it- gagging on the smell. Pee did them in last time, will poop do them in this time? What’s next, barf?

Zev and Justin and the Trotters deliver their hay and are the first to head off the Ramnagar Fort for the pit stop. Globetrotters go all the way from last to first and win a trip for two to the Big Island of Hawaii. Sweet! Zev and Justin are close behind.

Kent and Vixyssysin somehow end up on a boat and Vixyxysysyin dives off into the Ganges when the driver won’t turn it around. Kent immediately freaks out, probably because her makeup is now smearing. They end up on land and rudely kick someone out of a cab, finishing 6th. Christine and Hungry Ron finish 7th and last and are eliminated from the race. We’re going to miss Ron and his crazy antics but we’ll always have Seinfeld reruns where we can see him in his role as Frank Constanza.

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