Big Brother 13: 07.24.2011

After the last Big Brother eviction of Cassi by a 9-0 vote, Rachel is back in the driver’s seat as HOH…again. As Lawon says- this is Rachel’s house. Regulators alliance? Half gone. Looks like the only thing they are regulating is the couch back at their own homes.

The vets can’t believe how well everything is going. The only newb teams left are Dominic/Adametallic and Lawon/Kalia. All the Houseguests hide and then pillow attack Rachel when she does her “who wants to see my HOH room”. Nobody does, btw. Something nastier than pillows would have been much better (slop?).

Rachel gets her letter and Jeff just found out she’s engaged. Didn’t see the big ass ring Jeff? Really? No, seriously Jeff?

Beverly Hills 9021Adam tries to reaffirm his deal with Brenchel- who are not buying it. Lawon comes up and talks in circles which makes him seem less trustworthy. Lawon is just cruising by because he’s so clearly a poor player that he’s not a threat to anyone. I don’t think he has any clue what he’s doing (or even where he is). Is Kalia still in the house?

Luxury competition time. There’s a red carpet set up and some random dude comes out. Oh wow CBS cross promotion for “Same Name”, it’s a guy with the same name as a celebrity and they have to guess which celebrity it is based on clues. Jordan somehow gets David Hasselhoff from 3 bars of soap and opera glasses. A microphone is the next clue and leads to some really random guess. A knight with a rescue surfboard thing comes out and then Knight Rider with David fuckin Hasselhoff inside- JORDAN GOT IT!!!! Don’t Hassel the Hoff! Jordan clearly has some sort of special knowledge that the rest of universe simply cannot comprehend, like how sharks can sense electrical fields.

Jordan chooses Jeff, Kalia and Shelly to watch the screening with her which pisses Rachel the hell off. Don’t anger the irrational, Jordan, especially when she’s Big Brother HOH. Brenchel is fighting because Rachel gave an answer to Porsche during the competition. Ug-ly. Everyone is listening in too. Sore losers.

Hoff hangs out with the winners a bit while they eat sushi before the screening. Now Brendan is telling Rachel to throw Jeff/Jordan up on the block. Now they’re sounding like they both want out of the house themselves. OMG Brendan is crying again. Toughen up Booky, seriously. Nobody wants to see a grown man whining and crying like a baby Booky (Big Brother producers, take note, thanks).

Dominic makes a deal with Brenchel- since he thinks they’re a bigger target than he is. They’re trying to build a foursome with Dominic and Daniele. Daniele seems to want Jeff and Jordan up on the block too. Jeff comes up to Brenchel and everything seems cool between the two Veteran power couples but she still might just put them up.

Time for the nomination ceremony and Rachel has the big decision to make. Jeff and Jordan are safe- smart move Rachel. Kalia and Lawon are also safe meaning Dominic and Adam are up on the block for the second week in a row. This week is kinda playing out exactly how you would expect, if Dom or Adam win POV then Lawon/Kalia go up. It’s just a question of which of those 4 is gonna go home. But then again, anything can happen on Big Brother.

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