Celebrity Apprentice 2011 Ep03: Unhappy Campers

After the ousting of Lisa Rinna last week, crazy Gary Busey and Meat Loaf are having words. Loaf takes some advice from Billy Joel for a moment when he realizes “you should never argue with a crazy ma-ma-ma-ma-ma man”, so he says you’re right, I’m wrong. NeNe Leakes ain’t having none of Star Jones, saying she’s not the project manager so don’t try to get all up in the project manager spot.

The contestants are all brought down to the Trump Soho hotel and monstrosity where The Donald tells them about their task to create an outdoor camping experience for Camping World. Too bad Richard Hatch was already PM recently because this is sorta right up his alley. Nobody wants to do it (Lil Jon says “I’m the black guy, I don’t know anything about camping”). Busey gives the executives an insane pep talk about his heart being the only thing that’s free. Niki Taylor will be the PM for the ladies.

The men chose the pimpass giant tourbus style RV and the ladies go for the homier one with a fireplace (they have fireplaces in RVs?!!!). Right away Jose Canseco is saying the pimpbus sucks. The women of ASAP are getting along initially. The go with a 21st Century Camping World slogan. Star starts dominating the conversation with the executive.

Over at Backbone, Busey is shooting down Lil Jon’s ideas. Even Hatch can’t get a read on him on Busey’s madness. Busey has Meat confused too.

The unified ASAP arrives at the makeshift Camping World tent “store” which is really just a big ol’ tent on a pier and get to picking out their goods. Dionne is moving in beyond slow motion, grandma speed. John Rich comes up with a Camping World theme song in the van over and surprise! Jose is against it and calls country music fans out as “less educated”. John Rich stands up for country fans everywhere. Is it his strategy to simply disagree with EVERYTHING? That doesn’t seem sound.

Dionne and NeNe are saying Niki doesn’t have a clear vision. The women have more shopping carts full of crap than a post-apocalyptic homeless convention in a supermarket parking lot. The men arrive later yet leave first with their stuff. Mark McGrath is walking on the sun and orders up some trees as does Richard Hatch. Busey approves, forgetting about McGrath’s trees. Conflict! But McGrath manages to get his foliage order for free. If I had to describe Mark McGrath in this task I’d he was an All Star, getting his game on, go play? Yeah.

Star Jones, dressed up like she’s just back from her polo match is taking charge on the setup while Niki goes to meet with the graphic designer. She’s confused polo tent and camping tent, attirewise. The two models have no idea which century we’re in, thank goodness for Google.

Ivanka comes in to see Jose maxing and relaxing on the couch while Busey presents the insanity with one of his trademark acronyms. She politely calls him “an original”. Jose and Gary have enough time to just sit in some camping chairs and chillax while everyone else panics and does the work. Gary and Jose find some baseball gloves and a ball and toss it around, the best teamwork Canseco’s shown all task. A paniced McGrath videos it for evidence.

Dionne now wants to got o Bed Bath and Beyond and she surprisingly knows where it’s located! Meanwhile lil John Rich is carrying a 150lb generator while Jose is chilling on the couch.

Day of the presentation, the ladies are have balloons instead of trees, focusing more in the interior design. The men have astroturf, hedges and trees, focusing on the outdoor experience. LaToya is learning how door handles work and Dionne is paying her bills. The men are playing guitar and throwing baseball around like a real camping experience. Surprisingly Don Jr. says he’s been camping, a lot. Did The Donald take the kids camping when they were younger? Somehow I just don’t see it.

Dionne starts tattling to Niki on Playmate Hope, saying she’s in the wrong spot. Dionne calls her a “hussy” to Star. Men seem to be killing it in the presentation, using their celebrity to sell it to the executives. Until Meat doesn’t know there’s a hidden TV in a panel outside the RV- pimp indeed. ASAP is doing a decent job to the executive at least.

In the Boardroom, Trump calls LaToya “amazing”. Naturally Trump seems impressed when Star says Marlee Matlin was a “demon” in the bedroom. Hatch says that Busey “I believe he believes what he’s saying”. Busey reveals that Marlee hooked him up with hearing aids. Trump wants to hear JR’s Camping World song and sends Meat Loaf off running to fetch his guitar like a roadie.

As expected Backbone wins this one by far. Niki basically says that everyone did a good job and she’s to blame, pretty much giving up. Trump says he respects her taking responsibility an makes his easiest decision ever. Niki Taylor is fired.

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