Celebrity Apprentice 2012: ep02 Getting Medieval

Paul Sr. presents his winning check Make-a-Wish Foundattion. Now we’re off to Medieval Times with James Lipton, Donald Trump and Don Jr. Apparently James Lipton is a knight?! WTF? He has a suit of armor?! WTF?! Teams have to put on a 12-15 minute show and will be judged by the audience. Penn Jillette is the project manager for the men, Lisa Lampanelli for the women.

Showbiz. And off they go. Forte, the women’s team, want to be contemporary. Lisa Lampanelli is all business, saying no interruptions, laying down the law with the ladies. They want to do a Real Housewives of Camelot spoof. Sounds like a winning idea, they’re even trying to work a Snooki character in there. Medieval Snooki…ooh scary.

The men meet with the creative director who says they have the best horses and fighters available to them. Arsenio says he’s a huge fan and goes frequently. Really Arsenio? Lisa has Aubrey as her second in command. They want Miss Universe in a nude bodysuit. Sounds good to me. Lisa says she’s giving Victoria Gotti one of the most important tasks- lights and sound. Victoria says bullshit.

The men have a plan to have Dee Snider in drag and when the two knights fighting over him see him up close, they decide to kill themselves. Arsenio and Penn will host. The men need to practice the fighting sequence quite a bit. Lou Ferrigno doesn’t want to stop practicing the fight.

Lisa starts going off on Patricia. They settle it quickly though. Don Jr. likes their idea. Lisa is getting annoyed at Victoria’s unwillingness to be the stage director, wearing of a Louis Vuitton messenger bag while doing a swordfight scene, and inability to spell medieval. Next morning Victoria wants to speak to Trump to be put on the men’s team? Lisa says hell no, I will make it work, you are in charge of the lights and it’s important.

Over at Medieval Times, Paul Sr. brought in a bad-ass chopper with a medieval theme- chain mail exhaust pipes, etc. George Takei is wearing his costume the whole day lol.

Victoria is a mess in the run-through with the lights, she’s got the wrong script. Miss Universe and Aubrey are fighting.

The men do their run-through with horses and all. George Takei isn’t hitting his lines in the script and it’s screwing everyone else up, especially the lighting. Clay Aiken is getting pissed. Dee snider falls off the horse on the way in and breaks a finger. The EMT says he need to go to the hospital, and it’s nearly showtime. He’s the “female” lead, this could be a problem. Des says he’ll do it later, the show must go on.

Showtime! The crowd filters in and the Unanimous men start their presentation. Penn and Arsenio intro the show to big applause. George Takei reads his script and brings out Lou Ferrigno on a horse and Paul Sr. on his chopper motorcycle. Then Dee Snider in drag and Clay Aiken who wails out a huge note. There’s not much “plot” to their show but a lot of action and celebrity. The comedy angle worked pretty well, the crowd approved.

Now it’s Forte’s turn. Miss Universe comes out on a horse. Lisa is dressed as a Trump-like character and MC’s the show. Debbie Gibson looks great, and sings a bit then does a swordfight with Patricia. THe ladies are popping out of their dresses all over the place. Teresa Giudice and Tia Carrere swordfight and does the table-flip she’s well known for lol. Aubrey comes out as Medieval Snooki at the end.

Back to the boardroom they go. Penn doesn’t really want to bring anyone back if they lose but he says he’ll bring Lou Ferrigno and George Takei back should he need to. The Hulk is pissed! Lisa has an easier choice if they lose- Victoria Gotti. Her other choice is Miss Universe who she says had no skills beside just looking good. James Lipton tallies up the votes for the men’s team, they have 500 something votes from the audience. Don Jr. reads the total for the women’s team and it’s in the 300’s, the men win!

The women argue, Lisa Lampanelli cries and Trump doesn’t like the fact that Victoria wanted to quit and Victoria Gotti, you’re fired.

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