Real Housewives of Beverly Hills: S02E05: $25,000 Sunglasses?

Taylor and Kyle head over to her friend Dana’s house who opens the door in a tiara with boobs-a-poppin. She’s getting ready for her wedding, trying on jewelry and such. If she looks familiar it’s because I’m pretty sure she was on Flipping Out.

Chef Roland in the house…not sure why Bravo felt the need to put his name on screen as he cooks the three ladies lunch. She has a genius 18 month old apparently, he reads, does encyclopedia training, it’s ridonkulous. I’m so annoyed by Dana, she’s awesomely annoying. Plus she has two kitchen tables right next to each other- is that a Jeff Lewis Design feature?

Lisa is tasting new wines at Villa Blanca as her friend who is Kyle/Kim’s agent comes in. She says they want Lisa to be a commentator on the Royal wedding for TV.

Paul strutting in with his scrubs to Adrienne’s office. Adrienne’s having a barbecue party and inviting everyone. Jackpot the dog is pooping in Paul’s closet…that’s what I call drama. Not.

Brandi is meeting Taylor at a restaurant. Luckily it has bar height tables for these two giants. Taylor tells her about marriage counseling and her breakdowns.

At Kim’s house, she’s dusting off her photographs, missing all her kids who are out of the house these days. She’s lonely and the house is probably too big for her with all the kids gone.

Lisa and Ken are having dinner with Kyle and Mauricio. Giggy pees on the floor, a recurring theme it seems. Kyle calls out fake Dana on her genius 18 month old. Lisa and Ken think Kyle needs to intervene with Taylor.

Adrienne’s barbecue is going on, els’ got lifeguards, chef Bernie, blow-up bouncers, and a ton of booze. Big, broken-leg Brandi shows up first. Camille is there, everyone’s s little concerned that Kelsey’s in town. Brandi and Camille went through the same situation with the public remarrying of their husbands. The ladies are saying Camille needs to get out and start dating.

Dana shows up, no genius 18 month in tow unfortunately. She’s got a $25,000 pair of sunglasses Gold python with diamond piping. Brandi’s son gets out of the pool, strips down and pees on the grass in front of everyone. She doesn’t say anything to him about that. Kim hasn’t shown up yet, Kyle calls her and Kim’s not coming because she feels awkward without her kids. wtf?

Lisa’s getting ready for her CNN Royal Wedding gig. She runs into Dr. Drew in the hallway, wtf?

There’s Dana’s genius son John. No sign of any Thai talking or reading though. Brandi somehow offends Kyle by saying “cock” at the table. Brandi also offends Dana by implying that her husband who travels a lot has girlfriends all over the country. Off to a great start there Brandi.

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